Ben Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 Lay them on me. Your best warhammer jokes. Feel free to up and Down vote. The highest upvoted in 1 weeks time will get a custom title like my Supreme Hellsmith one. (This has never been done before on TGA!!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8 Skarloc Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 A skeleton walks into a bar.. It orders a beer and a mop.. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7 Acid_Nine Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 Two Enemy Wargroves want peace with each other. how do they agree on terms? Spoiler Through a Treety 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
7 jackmcmahon Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 What does the tzeenthian manager do when no patrons are being seated? Change hosts. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
6 Rock Lobster Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 Nagash: Lady Olynder, why did you miss the mortarch social last night? Olynder: I had no-body to go with... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5 The Jabber Tzeentch Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 (edited) Why did Sigmar cross the road? To open another Stormhost Chamber Edited July 21, 2019 by The Jabber Tzeentch 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5 The Jabber Tzeentch Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Knock knock. Who’s there? Doombull says. Doombull says who? No, a Doombull says mooooo! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
5 Spears Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Everyone hates necromancers, but they are just trying to raise a family. One necromancer in particular was overly invested in Bitcoin, it was a Cryptocurrency. This necromancer cared nothing for those around him, or even his meagre wound count, his only concern was curing his terrible breath. You see he was a super callous fragile mystic vexed by halitosis. 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4 King Taloren Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 (edited) A Stormcast, A Chaos Warrior and a Namarti Thrall walk into a bar and the Skink walks underneath it. Edited July 21, 2019 by King Taloren 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3 S133arcanite Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 Ghorgon walks into a bar. "I'd like to order a.... ...pint of beer." Barman says: "Why the big pause?" hehe 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3 Clan's Cynic Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 My paint jobs. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3 Moonlightwolf Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 King: I just had Hammerhal's ambassador for dinner. Courtier: Oh how was he? King: Delicious... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2 Kramer Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 27 minutes ago, The Jabber Tzeentch said: Why did Sigmar cross the road? To open another Stormvault To open Another stormhost you mean 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2 Fairbanks Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 A Khorne Berzerker, a Ironjaw Brute, and a Stormcast Liberator are walking through Shyish after a long battle. They spot a few skeletons and the Brute says to the other two, "Watch this!" He runs into headlong toward them, yelling "WAAAAGH!" and takes both of them out with a few swings of his axe. Both the Berzerker and the Liberator look at one another, perplexed at what they just saw. The Liberator asks, "What was that all about?" "The fight is good and the skeletons are cheap", says the Brute. The Liberator looks at the Berzerker, they nod their head in agreement, and the party continues onward. They spot a few more skeletons and the Liberator says to the other two, "Watch me". He runs into headlong toward them, yelling "For Sigmar!" and takes both of them out with a few swings of his hammer. Both the Berzerker and the Brute look at one another, perplexed at what they just saw. The Berzerker asks, "What was that all about?" "As was said, the fight is good and the skeletons are cheap", says the Liberator. The Berzerker looks at the Brute, they nod their head in agreement, and the party continues onward. They spot a single skeleton running toward them and the Berzerker says to the other two "Watch me". He lets the skeleton close on the group, takes it's head off with one swing and buries the axe in the Liberator. The Brute, not believing what his eyes just witnessed, looks at the Berzerker and asks "What in Gorkamorka's name was that about?" The Berzerker responds, "Blood for the Blood God, Skulls for the Skull Throne." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
2 Rock Lobster Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 What’s long brown and sticky? ...Durthu Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
1 Skreech Verminking Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 What happens when you combine a dragon that does d6-6 damage per attack with ogors that do 2-3damage per attack? Dragon ogors that do 1damage each!!😂 (ps: that joke was taken from rerolling ones, so credit goes to them) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 Skreech Verminking Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 (edited) are Only jokes of or in the aos setting allowed? Edited July 21, 2019 by Skreech Verminking Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 The Jabber Tzeentch Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Why are Gor such a terrible unit in AoS? Because they’re Ghorgon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 S133arcanite Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 12 hours ago, michu said: I would upvote it... but I don't understand the joke. Could you explain? A ghorgon has big paws 🐾 Yep, totally worth the wait. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 Scythian Posted July 21, 2019 Share Posted July 21, 2019 Are you ready? Not yeti! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 jackmcmahon Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 What does a megaboss on mawkrusha say after a nasty mirror match? Et tu brutes? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 Skreech Verminking Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 How do Orks call a wooden stick?? Dakka, dakka! (not sure if this one counts since it is technically from the 40k setting) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 Redking Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 A Sigmarite walks into a Sylvaneth non-metal bar. The treelord bartender says “AU, get out of here.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 Walrustaco Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 After a long battle between two warbands of Slaaneshi cultists and tribal Ogors, the victorious cultists take a prisoner for their twisted amusement. The head torturer decides to attempt to flay the Ogor's formidable skin so that he might taste of the great beast's torment. But to his increasing irritation he finds that no matter how deep his knife digs into the Ogor's flesh, more is displayed beneath. "How is it that this ogor has so much flesh beneath what my knife can pierce?!" The torturer squeals in rage. In answer, the ogor smiles a bloodied, toothless grin: "Ogors have layers." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 Rock Lobster Posted July 22, 2019 Share Posted July 22, 2019 What is the difference between a soul grinder and an Alegyzzler gargant? One has hydraulics the other has high-bollocks... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
0 Double Misfire Posted July 26, 2019 Share Posted July 26, 2019 What do Bloodthirsters eat at the cinema? Spoiler PopKhorne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Question
Ben
Lay them on me.
Your best warhammer jokes.
Feel free to up and Down vote.
The highest upvoted in 1 weeks time will get a custom title like my Supreme Hellsmith one. (This has never been done before on TGA!!)
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