Jump to content
  • 0

What is the Best Warhammer Joke?


Question

Lay them on me.  

Your best warhammer jokes.  

Feel free to up and Down vote.  

The highest upvoted in 1 weeks time will get a custom title like my Supreme Hellsmith one. (This has never been done before on  TGA!!)

Link to post
Share on other sites

Recommended Posts

  • 5

Everyone hates necromancers, but they are just trying to raise a family.

One necromancer in particular was overly invested in Bitcoin, it was a Cryptocurrency. This necromancer cared nothing for those around him, or even his meagre wound count, his only concern was curing his terrible breath. You see he was a super callous fragile mystic vexed by halitosis.

 

  • Like 2
  • Thanks 2
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 2

A Khorne Berzerker, a Ironjaw Brute, and a Stormcast Liberator are walking through Shyish after a long battle.

They spot a few skeletons and the Brute says to the other two, "Watch this!" He runs into headlong toward them, yelling "WAAAAGH!" and takes both of them out with a few swings of his axe. Both the Berzerker and the Liberator look at one another, perplexed at what they just saw. The Liberator asks, "What was that all about?"

"The fight is good and the skeletons are cheap", says the Brute. The Liberator looks at the Berzerker, they nod their head in agreement, and the party continues onward.

They spot a few more skeletons and the Liberator says to the other two, "Watch me". He runs into headlong toward them, yelling "For Sigmar!" and takes both of them out with a few swings of his hammer. Both the Berzerker and the Brute look at one another, perplexed at what they just saw. The Berzerker asks, "What was that all about?"

"As was said, the fight is good and the skeletons are cheap", says the Liberator. The Berzerker looks at the Brute, they nod their head in agreement, and the party continues onward.

They spot a single skeleton running toward them and the Berzerker says to the other two "Watch me". He lets the skeleton close on the group, takes it's head off with one swing and buries the axe in the Liberator. The Brute, not believing what his eyes just witnessed, looks at the Berzerker and asks "What in Gorkamorka's name was that about?"

The Berzerker responds, "Blood for the Blood God, Skulls for the Skull Throne."

  • Haha 1
Link to post
Share on other sites
  • 0

After a long battle between two warbands of Slaaneshi cultists and tribal Ogors, the victorious cultists take a prisoner for their twisted amusement.

The head torturer decides to attempt to flay the Ogor's formidable skin so that he might taste of the great beast's torment. But to his increasing irritation he finds that no matter how deep his knife digs into the Ogor's flesh, more is displayed beneath.

"How is it that this ogor has so much flesh beneath what my knife can pierce?!" The torturer squeals in rage.

In answer, the ogor smiles a bloodied, toothless grin: 

"Ogors have layers."

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Answer this question...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...