jkav86 Posted February 2, 2018 Share Posted February 2, 2018 I have yet to have a unit or hero be consistently bad in AoS, but back in the world of the past my Slann mage would regularly blow up himself and his unit of temple guard. It was a rare game that he didn't self destruct his own army. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
quina2525 Posted February 2, 2018 Share Posted February 2, 2018 In my AOS career, my weirdnob has successfully cast Foot once, even though I attempt it almost every turn with 20 orcs. It did one wound and failed to carry on. And Apparently my Warboss has 2 glass eyes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Aegisgrimm Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 I've been getting my Age of Sigmar fix with games of Age of Fantasy by One Page Rules, and my Savage Orruk shaman is incapable of casting any spells, despite only needing a 3+ to cast the weakest spell. In his opening debut as a proudly painted model, he failed every single round, until my opponent said "****** it" and charged a lone Liberator, who then simply killed him with a backhanded swing. ... He'll be back for revenge. Probably. Hopefully? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowgra Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 Between my friends is sadly famous my harbinger of decay. In almost an year and a half he did something like 5-6 unsaved wounds and he is so scared of combat that: 1) he will most likely flail all his hit rolls 2) if he passes 1 hit roll he will probably fail the wound roll 3) if for an incredible combination passes the wound rolls he tried to roll a 1-2 with all the strenght he has. Luckily most of the time the opponent saves it! Btw i didn't put in his rotsword once even with a 2+ roll to make! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Praecautus Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 So so many options in my khorne army. The daemon prince who got swamped by skinks and then vaporuized by a bastiladon. My mighty lord who led his army to victory in a path to glory campaign but was rewarded by being turned into a spawn! The exalted Deathbringer with impaling spear who has failed to get into combat more times than I care to remember. Herald of khorne who seems incapable of making even the shortest charge. My new squad of skull reapers who unadvisedly charged 40 zombies, killed about half of them before being overwhelmed and zombified themselves. I honestly don't know why my reavers and blood warriors follow this bunch of numpties. Many khorne likes the lols. Not AoS, but squad Lorenzo in spacehulk. They regularly volunteer for deadly missions but end being food for the genestealers while failing to get a single objective. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flemingmma Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 14 minutes ago, Praecautus said: So so many options in my khorne army. The daemon prince who got swamped by skinks and then vaporuized by a bastiladon. My mighty lord who led his army to victory in a path to glory campaign but was rewarded by being turned into a spawn! The exalted Deathbringer with impaling spear who has failed to get into combat more times than I care to remember. Herald of khorne who seems incapable of making even the shortest charge. My new squad of skull reapers who unadvisedly charged 40 zombies, killed about half of them before being overwhelmed and zombified themselves. I honestly don't know why my reavers and blood warriors follow this bunch of numpties. Many khorne likes the lols. Not AoS, but squad Lorenzo in spacehulk. They regularly volunteer for deadly missions but end being food for the genestealers while failing to get a single objective. Khorne cares not from where the blood flows, if your heroes cannot spill the blood of your enemies, their blood will suffice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Carnelian Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 This is the best thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cinncinnatus Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 I've rolled up a skycutter chariot in my last two Path to Glory campaigns. Its eagle eye bolt thrower, over the course of 6 to 8 games, never managed to do any damage. It got to a point where, in the last game, when it managed to hit (yes!) and managed to wound (YES!!!) even then my opponent was confident he would make the save throw, because that bolt thrower never does anything. He was right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PAR Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 took a giant to blood & glory it killed more points of my stuff falling over than it killed of my opponents across 6 games it lives on a shelf now............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LordKalebKhaine Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 My Darkoath chieftain loves making 7" and up charges only to wiff all 6 attacks. And then die. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chord Posted February 3, 2018 Share Posted February 3, 2018 All my stormcast heros love running one additional inch. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mayple Posted February 4, 2018 Share Posted February 4, 2018 15 hours ago, chord said: All my stormcast heros love running one additional inch. I believe they call that 'powerwalking' ''Advance, brothers!'' *shuffles forward* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Planar Posted February 5, 2018 Author Share Posted February 5, 2018 Love the responses . All these poor sods, failing to keep up with the big words in their warscrolls. I like them way more than the cool kids of the army... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flemingmma Posted February 11, 2018 Share Posted February 11, 2018 On 2/2/2018 at 10:36 AM, flemingmma said: My chaos lord doug just cannot land hits against stuff from the death allegiance. Also he has yet to successfully complete his Deamon reaper blade attack, every time he'll succeed his hit and wound rolls only to be blocked by the armour save even with a -2 rend. I just want to do 2d6 damage doug! He did it again, hit and wound rolls successful against a knight questor who then failed his armour save only to re-roll it due to an ability and Doug's massive attack whiffs once again. Dammit Doug! All I want is for you to kill things Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mayple Posted February 11, 2018 Share Posted February 11, 2018 So I made a replacement warlock for my consistently double 1s Arch-warlock. Started him out as a Warlock-engineer to do a sort of 'rise of' approach. He's fought in two battles so far. Well, I say fought, but in reality he blew himself up on his first turn in both matches. Hilariously, the second match saw my opponent place his whole army according to the warlock, and he got super frustrated when the warlock exploded without doing anything Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Planar Posted February 12, 2018 Author Share Posted February 12, 2018 Weirdnob also had an epic (and consistently self destructive) game yesterday. Round 1, Attempts to mystic shield on the Cabbage, rolls doubles, causes 3 wounds on the Warchanter round 2, Attempts foot of Gork, fails round 3, Attempts foot of Gork, rolls doubles kills a brute. round 4, Successfully casts Foot of Gork (hurray!), causes 2 mortal wounds on Gaunt Summoner who promptly saves both with is 5+ ward save. End of round 4, opponent's 3 year old son places his toy car next to the Shaman. Time to go Billy... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Double Misfire Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 1 hour ago, Planar said: I'm really sorry, but that image should be captioned "The Italian Weirdnob" Spoiler Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kirjava13 Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 I can only imagine his fellow Ironjawz were glad to see the back of that useless git! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Twitch of Izalith Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 I can only assume that my Exalted Deathbringer is exalted for bringing his own death because he dies in every single game... Similarly I'm not surprised the Bloodthirster of Insensate Rage is angry. I would be angry if my gigantic axe consistently bounced off naked dwarves who then go on to stab me to death with tiny ice picks... Its a good job that Khorne cares not from whence the blood flows because his followers are much better at dying than killing stuff. I think they should form a union and demand that their employer fulfills his duty of care and provides them with appropriate equipment and PPE for their designated tasks - i.e. Real axes instead of ones from the LARP store and Dwarf proof armour for a start. Bleed for the Blood God!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Niltzsche Posted February 12, 2018 Share Posted February 12, 2018 My Frostlord on Stonehorn has the tendency to just fail most charges, especially the shor ones. He yet has to succed with a 3 inch charge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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