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LoofIsFool

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  1. Hey @Ggom! I've been following (in the forum lurking format) your blog for a while and really enjoy your style! In fact I just registered to wheigh in on your outlook on things and maybe add something to/underline what @MitGas has said. First off: having a hobby you enjoy is super healthy. If you feel like you are wasting time doing something that is "sisyphean" (I had to look that word up 😅 ), you could always turn your perspective around; if something never ends, you can always improve and grow doing it. I got the impression that you saw causality between your hobby and where your at in life right now, and even though everything is somehow connected, the regret you feel (I'm reading that a bit like "self blame") might be misplaced. I've been in therapy now for a year maybe and one of the things I've learnt from that is to always keep in mind that even though one might know oneself, one might not understand oneself, and the problems we percieve/experience might be caused by something way different. Because of this, the solutions to our percieved problems might be rather different too. Secondly I agree 100% with MitGas in that you can change things around. I had a devastating, drawn out break up a couple of years ago that completely shattered any self-esteem I had, and I got really depressed because of it. I developed sociophobia and self isolated to an extent even before covid. Blamed myself alot too (which from experience, I can confirm is not the most helpful state of mind 😉). I am happy where I'm going right now though, and I got here because I decided I wanted more from life. I started taking positive steps (therapy, working out), and got positive reinforcement from it, which led me to take additional steps. You don't have to start making big dramatic changes and become a new person over night, you just got to start where you're at, and by just doing positive things for yourself you might be suprised how much easier things get if you stick to it! Thirdly: Your witch aelves are kick ass! The dagger on the standard bearer is looking like a fusion between crystal and metal to me. super cool! Very impressive painting all around!
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